Wading through murky feelings

There are days when murky feelings don’t seem to to want to go away. Nothing is going all the way wrong, but things don’t feel quite right either.

Today was one of those days for me. On the one hand, I wonder if it’s because my baby girl keeps waking up at ungodly hours of the morning (shouldn’t we be past this by now?). On the other hand, I think I’m just stressed out.

While it was a “murky” day, there was a difference. There was an intentionality behind how I handled the murkiness of it. I didn’t reach for my purse and head to the vending machine for a bag of cookies or a chocolate bar and I didn’t let it color the interactions that I had with other people. And the only way that happened was that I paused.

I walked over to a window seat at the office with my journal and pen in hand and wrote out how I was feeling. In that moment, here’s what I realized what was different about this time:

  • When feeling murky, it’s worth taking a beat. Breathe, write, close my eyes, walk, stare at the ceiling. Don’t ignore the feelings and soldier on even if it feels like the thing to do. Ignoring the stirring of murky feelings is like ignoring an important call from your heart and soul to stop and nurture myself.
  • Accolades, recognition, money, and power mean nothing if I’m not living my definition of a good life. But I need to answer the question “what’s a good life for me?” That’s my job to define.
  • I never win when I compare myself to anyone else, no matter how great they are.

How do you wade through murky feelings?

xoEJ

P.S. Today I write about the work I’m doing to be a good human while raising two lovely humans of my own, but I once wrote a book about weight loss…check it out.

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